Should all EXes be EXhiled?

Just when you think your life is going just right… You’ve got the perfect man at your side and things are going great. Boom! An ex from your past decides to “check in” on you, through a phone call, a text, an email, or whatever else the kids use these days. Well, as hard as it may be for most of us gals to admit, a little innocent “check in” from an ex isn’t always so innocent. In fact, that “check in” can set off a long and unpleasant chain of events that could potentially ruin your current relationship.

Bottom line? Exes can be detrimental to current relationships – especially if the new relationship is especially fresh. But why and how can exes ruin new relationships if they are going so well!? Because – us women are always trying to compare and contrast everything – shoes, handbags, the latest sales, and sometimes even men. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. After all, everything in life is relative, so a little compare-and-contrast here and there isn’t so bad. What we need to remember, is that (mostly) everything is fine in moderation, but when moderation goes out the door, bad things start to happen. At first, it’s just a harmless little text from an ex asking you “how are you?”. Let’s be honest, if you’re a female, you’ll probably want to respond with a polite but also “in your face” kind of answer – something about how you’re doing “great” and that you’re “so so happy”. This will most likely encourage your ex to keep the conversation going and ask you even more questions – making you feel “oh-so” important!! Believe me, once you’re roped in, you’re roped in for good. Exes have a magical way of making us believe that they care – and hell, maybe they do! Just remember, they’re an “ex” for a reason. Unfortunately, if an ex is being nice, it is easy to forget that reason and why the two of you broke up in the first place. So, if you woke up this morning with a text from an ex, you get to make the next call. Choose wisely. Are you going to respond and open a door of communication (who knows where that will lead you), or is leaving the past in the past a better option? If you’ve already fought your demons on this and still somehow and someway decided that responding is a good idea (way to go, champ!) then a good rule of thumb is to keep the whole interaction VERY short and minimal. Give the conversation a 5-minute (not 50-minute) window and get the hell out of there. Exes are exes for a reason, especially if you have a great relationship going in the present, why would you ever run the risk of jeopardizing that? The grass is NOT always greener on the other side, ladies.

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